When everything’s wrong …cleaning 

Hi all
After a discussion with my partner this morning it seems I can’t do anything right .Whether it’s not washing up straight away, not putting something back where it goes or simply not putting the toilet roll on the holder the right way.
Don’t get me wrong, my house is very clean I just don’t agree with the stereotype that it’s the ‘woman’s job’ if I wasn’t working full time and was a house wife I would have no problem with that, but I do work a lot so for me it’s done when it’s done.
Who can actually say what is right and wrong. It’s just different. We were both do things in different ways and I think that has a lot to do with how were brought up.
When I was younger my step mum would be hoovering on her way out of the door to go on to on holiday. A normal day you would be looking at 6times a day.!! I think because I saw this a lot when I was growing up I don’t like to over do it, I would rather do something else during that time.
My partner however..We have a constant joke that he has OCD (obviously if you do actually have this it isn’t a joke) he likes to see the stripes in the carpet after hoovering it and won’t walk back over it after it’s done because it will flatten the pile and leave a foodprint. Where as for me if there’s no bits on the floor it’s job done.
Anyway, my point is just because he see it as wrong does that actually make it wrong?
In my eyes… NO! So whenever you feel like you can’t do anything right (and I must admit I’m a bit of a pro at it) just think…is it really wrong or is it just different to how you do it? And also it’s the 21st century …we can’t all be perfect housewives.
Thanks for reading

T x


3 thoughts on “When everything’s wrong …cleaning 

  1. JoAnna says:

    When I worked as a counselor for 30 plus years, housework differences were a common challenge for couples. No two people have exactly the same preferences when it comes to tolerance for mess or need for order. Now, that I’m “retired” it still takes a lot to keep up with the housework, but I believe that when both people work outside the home, both need to do the housework in a way that feels balanced and reasonable. I also believe there are more important things than cleaning. One thing you might do is ask your partner, after acknowledging his concern, and maybe at a separate time, is: What do you see that I’m doing right? This is how I ended my couples counseling sessions, by asking each person to share some things they appreciate or like about the other. Hopefully he can handle this well, but if not, ask yourself. What are some of the things you do right, that you are satisfied with, happy with about yourself? Best wishes!


    • wallsoftor says:

      Hi! I’m glad to know it’s totally normal for a lot of other couples to, think I will actually do that, everyone focuses on what’s wrong not what’s right. Definitely something I’m going to try with him though. I think we just get so caught up in the day to day sometimes we don’t appreciate the little things we do for each other. But it doesn’t stop us loving each other deeply. Thank you so much for your advise, one day I would love to be a counsellor myself. I went through domestic violence at 16-18 and I would really love to help other women out there know that we are strong and it all turns out ok. Thank you again

      Liked by 1 person

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